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Counselling is a chance to rethink your feelings, and to re-feel your experiences; and to digest what
needs to be digested, and then move on.
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SOME PRACTICAL DEFINITIONS
In simple terms, counselling
involves one person (the counsellor) helping another person (the client) to work through some difficult or painful emotional,
behavioural or relationship problem or difficulty.
This takes place in a confidential meeting,
in a quiet room, and is subject to a code of ethics which specifies what the counsellor can and cannot morally do in that
context. (See the Accreditation and Ethics page).
As practiced by Jim Byrne, counselling
and therapy (and coaching) amount to helping the client to identify the source of their emotional or behavioural problems;
and/or to refine their understanding of their practical problems; and/or to clarify their goals in relation to some developmental
challenge; and/or to overcome their emotional, behavioural or relationship difficulties or problems. To understand how he
operates as a counsellor is to perceive him as a "(relatively) wise philosopher who teaches what he has used to heal
his own life".
There are, of course, different approaches to counselling, with some being quite passive, listening
forms of counselling; while others are more analytical of the sources of the presenting problem; and others quite philosophical
and into teaching the client the philosophical wisdom of the ages.
I see my work as a combination of an empowering
relationship and a teaching/learning encounter. For some schools of counselling, the relationship is primary. For example:
‘Pilgrim (1997) describes psychotherapy as a “type of personal
relationship entailing a series of negotiated meetings containing conversations" (p. 97). The central feature of psychotherapy
is defined by Holmes and Lindley (1989) as "..... the use of a relationship between therapist and (client) - as opposed
to pharmacological or social methods - to produce changes in (thinking), feeling and behaviour". These more universal
definitions tend to focus upon the relationship. A definition reflecting the unique social role of psychotherapy is offered
by Smail (1987). He describes it as a situation where people are offered the rare opportunity to pursue the truth about themselves
and their lives. This is without the threat of blame and disapproval and without the risk of offending or hurting the person
to whom they are revealing themselves. Although these definitions emphasise different aspects, all indicate how central the
relationship is to any understanding of the practice of psychotherapy’. Neil Scott Gordon (2000, March).
In the UK there are 99 organizations representing counsellors, and each of them varies somewhat in
their emphasis on what counsellors do. Forty-six of those counselling organizations are (directly or indirectly) in negotiations
with the government about professionalization of the field.
One of those forty-six organizations, the BACP, defines
counselling as follows:
"Counselling takes place when a counsellor
sees a client in a private and confidential setting to explore a difficulty the client is having, distress they may be experiencing
or perhaps their dissatisfaction with life, or loss of a sense of direction and purpose. It is always at the request of the
client as no one can properly be 'sent' for counselling".
"By listening attentively and patiently the
counsellor can begin to perceive the difficulties from the client's point of view and can help them to see things more clearly,
possibly from a different perspective. Counselling is a way of enabling choice or change or of reducing confusion. It does
not involve giving advice or directing a client to take a particular course of action. Counsellors do not judge or exploit
their clients in any way". (Source: BACP website - http://www.bacp.co.uk/education/whatiscounselling .html). Much of this definition would be acceptable to most counsellors in the UK. In addition, we have the
concept of "therapy", which comes from the Greek word for "healing". And counselling and therapy, which
overlap significantly, can be said to be in the business of "healing the life" of the client. Or helping the client
to "heal themselves". No attempt to distinguish counselling from therapy has been particularly successful, and it
is best to see "counselling and therapy" as a unified field of endeavour. (See: Nelson-Jones, 2002, Essential
Counselling and Therapy Skills, pages 4-5).
As practiced by Jim Byrne, counselling and therapy (and
coaching), amount to helping the client to identify the source of their emotional or behavioural problems; and/or to refine
their understanding of their practical problems; and/or to clarify their goals in relation to some developmental challenge;
and/or to overcome their emotional, behavioural or relationship difficulties or problems. To understand how he operates as
a counsellor is to perceive him as a "(relatively) wise philosopher who teaches what he has used to heal his own life,
and to gain mastery over his own affairs". But he does this with one eye on the emotional component of the relationship
with the client.
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