Anger Management Coaching - Part 2
 
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Defining Anger

How you define anger make a difference to your potential for controlling it.  Here's the best definition of anger that has been produced, based on the original thinking of Dr Albert Ellis, combined with the researches of Dr Jim Byrne.

Defining Anger

WHAT IS ANGER ANYWAY?

Let's take a look at what anger is, and how you could learn to control it.

Anger is an overly-upset emotion, linked to aggression and hostility; or the instinctive 'fight response'. Your body fills with adrenalin and other chemicals that make you feel enraged, often flushed, and very uncomfortable. It is normally precipitated when you face problems of frustration, threats to your self-concept, or when others 'misbehave' according to your rules. But it's not these events that 'cause' your anger. Actually it's the attitude that you adopt towards the frustration or threat that more directly causes the anger.

The attitudes that precipitate anger are quite distinct from those that only cause irritation or annoyance. It would be appropriate to be irritated or annoyed when you get frustrated or threatened with loss of face, for examples; but it is never appropriate to get angry. Anger is a wholly destructive emotion that works against your best interests, and normally worsens your problems.

  • Would you like to be able to cool down?
  • Do you want to be able to handle your problems more effectively and productively?
  • Would you like to be able to produce more light and less heat?

Allowing your anger to get out of control normally results in some detriment to you; some loss of face; or loss of dignity. People who lose control of their anger often feel shame, embarrassment, guilt or depression after their raging outbursts. This often results in a loss of face, a sense of self-hatred, and a loss of social standing at home or at work. These are high prices to pay for a few minutes of angry madness. And, of course, anger can also fuel aggressive assault and consequent legal action, including imprisonment for grevious bodily harm.

I can teach you how to only get irritated and annoyed when you are frustrated or threatened with loss of face, or when you get confronted by the 'bad behaviour' of others. If you can learn how to only become irritated and annoyed, then you can think straight about your problem, and communicate effectively, to try to change the situation that is getting you wound up.  And once you know how to stop angering yourself, your life will become calmer and happier, and your relationships will improve.

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THE CHARACTERISTICS OF HAPPY PEOPLE:

COMMUNICATION SKILLS
"The ability to exchange information and feelings with other people is crucial for happiness and success. You are unlikely to maintain good relationships with partner, friends, relatives, parents, children or colleagues if you are unable to communicate effectively with them or if you keep inadvertently sending them the wrong messages". Martin (2005), page 52.

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Would you like me to teach you how to control your anger, and how to respond more appropriately?

If you would like help with problems involving anger, rage, hostility and/or aggression, then please email Jim Byrne here ABC Coaching and Counselling Services, and arrange a face-to-face session in Hebden Bridge or Halifax; You could also phone me on 01422 843 629, from inside the UK, or 44 1422 843 629, from outside the UK.

Or you could opt for 'distance coaching', by telephone, email exchanges or over the internet, using voice or video or Instant Messaging chat. Coaching sessions cost £27.00 for forty minutes of *online* contact (by email exchanges, video conferencing over the internet, or internet relay chat); and £27.00 for thirty minutes of *telephone* coaching.

For *face to face* coaching, the arrangements are as shown on the F2F counselling page.

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Do you want to control you anger and rage, before it controls you? Email Jim Byrne to set up a *face-to-face* coaching session in Hebden Bridge or Halifax; or to request further information. Email: Jim Byrne

Or: Book one full session of Online Anger Management Coaching - using Instant Messaging - for £36.00 GBP (or $US50 USD, or Euros 39 [plus local taxes]). One session of IM anger management.

Or: Book one full session of Telephone Coaching in Anger Management for £36.00 GBP (or $US50, or Euros 39 [plus local taxes]). Telephone coaching in anger management.

Or phone me today on 44 1422 843 629 (from outside the UK), or 01422 843 629 (from inside the UK).

Or email me on Jim's Email Address.

Back to Home Page.

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Dr Jim Byrne

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